h a p p y

1. be nice to the people you don't like for good faith to go towards your loved ones, kind of like karma I guess. 

2. listen to your mama she can spot the bad when you're blinded by love/lust. 

3. eat foods from the earth and stay active. even if it's twice a week. you're doing something at least

4. down to your last dollar? give it to someone in need.

5. keep your faith alive and personal, don't shove your beliefs and opinions down other peoples throats

6. don't say yes if you don't mean it, make yourself happy first 

7. when in doubt write it out

8. love yourself, you can't love another person fully if you can't even be kind to yourself

9. take care of your skin, hair, and nails. take your vitamins and get/make your treatments. 

10. say hi to strangers. look up and smile. 

11. apply to jobs/schools you fear, you never know

12. the word 'friend' should be given sparingly. be careful. 

13. travel alone and eat alone, you usually meet great company. but your own company should always be your favorite. 

14. know you are never alone, when you love yourself, you will know this is true 

15. be on time 

16. always give back, and pay it forward 

17. don't do anything for recognition 

18. you only have one body, be nice to it! don't sham yourself. encourage it, it's keeping you alive! 

19. read. a lot more. 

20. be careful with what news outlets you trust 

21. always friend the locals, they know more than anyone. they are the people. 

22. listen. give your undivided attention. put your phone down. 

23. be the person you want to meet

24. say 'thank you' to a compliment. that's beautiful and humble, not "omg no way I'm blah blah." stop!

25. be silly

26. feed the stray animals when you can 

27. stay connected to your loved ones, keep your foot in their worlds too.

28. be around people who want to talk to you about theories and controversies of science and the world, not gossip about others. 

29. sleep 

30. live like a nomad for a year, sleep on floors if you have to. the heavenly views and sunsets make it worth it.

31. volunteer because you care, not to make yourself look better 

32. global issues are OUR problems, not their problems 

33. pray/meditate, or something...theist or atheist, there is always something you can do to free your mind and soul. if you don't believe in the soul do a logic puzzle then lol those are fun help you unwind. 

34. leave the patriotic and self-entitled attitude at home before you travel. 

35. they don't speak english, it's never their fault. it's yours for not learning the local language before your travels. 

36. don't believe social media, people make themselves seem like prophets on there. image crafting can be dangerous 

37. love. no matter how hurt you are love anyways. 

38. the greatest battle is to battle your own soul, to fight, the evil within yourself 

39. do not find the fault in others, if you find the fault in them, god may take their faults way and give them to you. 

40. routine may perhaps be lethal, but it is still necessary. have a positive and enjoyable one wherever you end up 

41. you grow outside your comfort zone

42. eat on the floor

43. don't be around energies that influence you negatively. if they make you feel bad, stay away. it's lethal. 

44. whole heartedly believe in good faith because it exists

45. smile, you may have made/saved someone's day 

46. it will never ever be cool to be mean 

47. if you don't communicate thoroughly and kindly, it will never be resolved 

48. always wonder and wander

49. Anything said before the "but" is bs. I love you but...hahaha (my professor taught me this)

50. feed your soul, not the ego 

51. close your eyes, fall in love, and stay there. be foolishly in love, because there is nothing else greater than love 

52. good attracts good, what you see around in the world is a reflection of who you are. any ounce of hate in your heart is poison. get rid of that toxic it has no place to be in your beautiful heart. 

53. don't compare journeys or paths, rather support and send love that we all make it 

Just a list I compiled. There are many more you guys should add to it. The way I try to live especially as a nomad lol. Traveling doesn't change you. It just heightens your strengths and weaknesses. I'm still indecisive and naive melody. I still have a bad sense of direction and my blonde moments are heightened to the max. However, I do know more than ever that I should love everyone, trust a few, and learn from all. Everyone is bound to teach and influence us in some shape or form, it's up to our character to form the outcome of it. Be the person you crave to be, and do the beautiful things your heart desires. When you learn to become friends with your heart incredible experiences and miracles come your way. Don't forget to always spread that love!

"Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love." -Maria Rilke 

all of my love,

melody 

do what you can

Simple

This blog entry will be a little different than my updates. I guess this one will be a reflection entry. Or something like that? Short and simple.

I have been in Indonesia for five months now. Yes, it has been five beautiful, chaotic, humbling, exhausting, crazy, loving, and fulfilling months. There have been days where I am on the back of motorbike riding into the sunset with an ice cream cone in my hand, laughing and singing country lyrics obnoxiously as I snap chat the moments. Then there are nights I am in my bed crying my heart out trying to figure out if I should just pack up and go back to my comfort zone. But then I think will that even solve anything? Won’t I just cry at home because I didn’t finish what I started?

You see, as I seek my love for knowledge and as I seek my love for the world, I am forgetting to balance it with my love for my spirituality. You can’t eat a banana split without the bananas; it loses all-purpose of having a banana split! Lol weird analogy, but it works. Alas, I am learning to love the questions themselves that linger in my heart and soul, because I know I am living my way to the answers. I am not expecting immediate results, however I am expecting an incredible amount of effort from my end.

The first three months were a struggle. Acclimating to a foreign home that is very different from mine, but God does send you some precious gems to help you. Never do I go a day without hearing someone say “Hello Melodeeeee, how are you today?” That means, these people no matter how they are feeling that day, regardless of their poverty stricken situations or even comfortable/rich lifestyles, have the time to always ask me how am I. It may not mean much to you all, but when you are nowhere near your family and loved ones, it means the world to you. You can enjoy being alone, but it does not mean you are ever lonely. Human connection and interaction is all around you, YOU have to make the time and effort to smile and be kind. That’s exactly what I promised myself to do. Talk to the cab driver that is eagerly curious about America and Obama. Talk to the little old lady who is curious about this young naïve girl roaming the streets at dawn. Or take that photo with the little girl who is admiring you from afar, you will make her happy. Communicate with your eyes, with your smile, and most importantly your heart, even if you cannot speak their words. They will understand because kindness is universal and it makes everyone feel something happy in their heart. You will start to slowly see that these strangers become your family in your heart.  

Giving back is the best feeling. No amount of money or material matters can compete with the feeling of helping those in need. I am grateful for my search and successes with helping the children, elderly, and women in poverty. The point is whatever you do to help bring awareness on important matters, always be genuine about it. Do it for them, never for you. Our world is insanely sad. I am talking about six year olds smoking cigarettes or toddlers begging for money and food; sights that should never exist. We have to do what we can by hoping that one interaction of positive reinforcement can spark a drastic change. If it doesn’t, its okay you at least TRIED. I have to keep reminding myself this. It is really difficult to not be emotional about everyday injustices. You see over a million child refugees of Syria, the hungry children around the globe, the lack of proper education, and the child brides of the world and it hurts, damn it. It hurts so much because no matter how hard you try you cannot fix it all. However, educating one child is a power that can never be taken away, and that feeling alone is what keeps me yearning to make a difference. Be the good you want to see in the world.

As far as my personal growth, it’s a beautiful struggle and I am doing it. Some simple yet important advice I am practicing everyday. Don’t compare yourself to other people’s journeys; we have our own path to follow. Support and love all, even if they are haters. Because any amount of hate in your heart is still a poison that has no place to be there, it will only spread. Traveling shows you the beauty and the ugly about the world and yourself. You see what you do like and don’t like about yourself and others. You decide what type of people and energies you want to share your soul with. You really learn to become friends with your heart. Your heart is what helps guide you to your passions and desires, don’t fight it. Learn to love your own company, when you do you learn to love yourself. You can’t love others fully if you don’t even love yourself. It’s not fair to anyone.

Everything I have written thus far is raw emotion from my heart. I thank the love people have sent my way from near and afar.

All of my love,

melody xx

backpacking the hot springs

beautiful children of the kampung, where we built their homes

That one time I did an extreme update

Hello lovely people,

Well, it is time for an update. Since my last post I have been teaching and traveling as much as I can. I’ve been reaching my written goals and lacking in succeeding in the some other goals. But, hey, it is okay for now. I have been on quite the adventure the last month, with little to no sleep, on the go, learning new words, meeting new people, appreciating more views, struggling spiritually, mentally, and emotionally. But, what good is a blog if you do not write the vulnerable truth—eh? This will be a long one lol, happy reading or exit now!

            As far as teaching, it is a pretty simple workload. My students range from 6 to 20 years old, individually teaching me more about my patience and heightening my cultural awareness. My students keep me on my toes, literally. I am either chasing them around to wear them out, or I am trying to implement the best lesson for the hour to get their thoughts flowing in English.  

            Traveling around Indonesia has been a rollercoaster ride with no stops, just whirlwinds and sharp twists that scrapes some skin off by the end of the ride figuratively and literally. For example in Bogor, I took a selfie with my orangutan friend Jenny. She took one for us too. This was the highlight of my life, all of my life having this creepy obsession with monkeys, and I had the chance to play with one and feed/love her! But, it’s a catch 22. Taman Safari is still a zoo in a developing country. I am not a fan of zoos or holding animals captive in general whether it is a developed country or not. They’re meant to be wild and free in their own safaris from their native lands with a majority in Africa or any other place of origin.

I ran around in the rain with the elephants, loving them and playing with them. But, I could see the gashes and cuts all around their rough edged skin, and I just couldn’t take it anymore. There were moments I shed light tears when I saw a baby tiger “drugged up” so it can be sound asleep for the millions of people paying to take their photo with the exotic beauty. It was hard. The conditions were not great, I saw a bear panting back and forth half shaven and it looked miserable. First of all, Indonesia is directly on the equator. Bears need winter hibernation, the logic of a bear living here, blows my damn mind. But there goes everyone with their cameras glued to their hands and positioned to their faces to see a bare bear. Zebras, bulls, deer, antelopes, elephants, hippos, and even a tiger walk up to the cars. Some of them you feed. And the other ones you have to be careful or you will be their dinner lol. In simple terms, this was the most conflicting experience in my life. It was beautiful to see happy jenny, but heartbreaking and tear jerking to feel the emotional pain of these tightly caged wild animals, that needed to return home.

            Traveling is a gift. Not a gift that is tied beautifully in a big red bow. No. More like a weak moment that is unexpected and handed to you for no special occasion. Mine was given to me when I found myself sobbing on the bathroom floor of a stranger’s kost (similar to a boarding house). Don’t feel sorry for me. I needed this moment. It felt refreshing like damn; I survived the chaos of acclimating to a new way and culture, lifestyle, thought-process, language/food, digestive problems, mentality…etc. And I did it. I needed a good healthy, long, obnoxious cry to feel whole again. Being far away from love and comfort is difficult. In my heart I believe that God and his universe send you gifts, especially for good people. My gift at this time in Bogor was my roommate and friend Megan. Who let me cry on her shoulder, with no explanations needed; my mascara, drool, and tears mixed and smeared all over her salmon pink t-shirt holding me like a mama bear would hold her cub. She looked at me while pulling my tangled hair out of my face and said smilingly “your feet smell”. I couldn’t help but laugh so hard, after running around getting lost in the beautiful strange city for a couple hours, covered in mud and elephant/monkey hugs…I forgot how bad I smelt. My tears were streaming along my now smiling face. Love isn’t far away after all; you just don’t realize the desire for it until you need it. This is a reality folk. I love my travel experiences; however, I don’t want to image craft and filter only the beauty of my travels and leave the messes and chaos in the dark. They need some light too. It is what feeds me the strength to keep going another day, happily.

PART II

It was around 2am. The taxi man I called for was sleeping peacefully when I walked up to his car door with my overly packed bags. I decided to tiptoe back to the house and risk the chance of being late or missing my flight, so he could have a few more moments of peace from his hectic day. A few short moments later, I woke him with fuel aka a cappuccino and some cakes to energize his body. His way of thank you was going around 100 MPH to get me to the airport on time haha, I said “it’s okay mister just get me there safely”. I decided to be spontaneous and book a weekend trip to the beautiful islands of Bali, Lombok, and the Gili islands! Let’s just say…I never wanted to come back to Jakarta, EVER AGAIN after seeing the unfiltered created beauties of the islands. AHHH, I just want to scream of joy just thinking about my weekend lol. Can I just go back now? Okay, okay, okay, I will continue.

SIDE NOTE: Indonesia has over 500 different languages and dialects depending where they are geographically placed. Each island speaks their own language, practices their own cultural rites and rituals, believes in their own religion (majority are Muslim, apart from Bali being Hindu and other minorities), however, they all speak Bahasa as their national language.

I arrived in Kuta, Bali with no sleep and crazy energy to explore with my wonderful American friend Bri! There are vendors along the narrow pathways selling, hooting, hollering, yelling, touching you, pushing you, and saying “darling, beautiful, come, buy $5” with their Balinese accents. Kuta is a lively city, but the Balinese culture has been washed away with all the foreigners straying abroad. It’s a good place to party and be “Western” but it is VERY dirty too. I went swimming in the ocean and I walked out with bugs crawling all over my body and plastic wrappers tangled in my hair. Nonetheless, it is still an experience that was needed to be experienced. I am surprised my body did not crash on me with the sleep deprivation I gave it.

I did not have the opportunity to explore all of Bali this time around, but I went to Ulu-Watu, which is the beautiful Hindu temple on top of the cliff overlooking the clean crystal-blue waters and floral pathways. You have monkeys running around jumping on you, stealing your glasses and water bottles, and just outright being obnoxious haha, I fed one my coconut, he would’ve taken it from me either way.

In Bali, my inner bargainer sprang out and won the Balinese treasures all thanks to Bri who knows what’s up, they weren’t too happy. I tried my best to avoid stepping on the colorful offerings (a part of the Hindu religious rites and rituals) that are scattered all over the streets and pathways of the island. I found myself picking up a flower here and there and putting it behind my ear just to feel like a pretty island girl haha.

We took a ferry to Lombok (my favorite place ever), and on the deck I was able to sleep soundly with the breeze hitting my sore tired body. We had the deck pretty much to ourselves. I woke up to dolphins surrounding the ship, a view of clear baby blue skies and the contrast of the blue-sky ocean water. A moment of thanks had to be given. When we arrived we found a home stay called “Indah’s Home Stay”. The owner is a Dutch woman, and she has done a great job at making it feel like a home away from home. There is a straight path just for her garden with a variety of flowers and plants (that she planted herself) right when you open the door to come outside, and a little bungalow in the green scenery to enjoy your homemade Dutch pancake. The walk to the beach is about 5 minutes and you get to walk by the homes of the natives. I always think we should support local businesses anywhere in the world we go. They need it, and they do a great job at making your stay much more personal and lovely. There was a little private shower attached to the home. No warm water but it’s okay. The orange colored sky and the brightly lit moon, with the azan prayer calling from next door made it worth it and more.

I knew it was heavenly when I saw no sight of trash or bargainers pushing me into their shop. They have no speed limits. Which can be good and bad lol. Their traffic is nowhere near the chaos in Jakarta or even in Bali. The people of Lombok, or the Sassak people, still have their culture profoundly active which I was forever appreciative to experience. Clearest and cleanest waters, divine sunsets and sunrises, empty streets and friendly strangers; it was exactly what I hoped my experience in Indonesia would be. The nightlife is just like any Asian country would be—karaoke style! So of course, we danced the night away singing along like we owned the songs with the ocean waves in body lengths reach. 

The best part of traveling is that you meet people from all over the world. On our snorkeling trip to the three main Gili islands, we had a newlywed Russian couple, a woman from Estonia named Evelin, and of course my wonderful friends Lucy from England and Bri from America. With language and cultural barriers, we managed to make it work brilliantly. Swimming with the fishes and sea turtles in the exotic warm waters, running out of breath every now and then, all I could do is be grateful for every moment of this crazy journey that led me here to this moment. As I was swimming I could hear the Azan from a far away mosque, I know I mention that a lot in my writings I just cannot help that it calls at the most beautiful and vulnerable times I’ve been here.

At each island I ended up exploring what it had to offer. The first one I rented a bike to explore its tropics and bumpy roads (ouch). I ended up chilling in hammocks on the white sand beaches, climbing up cliffs, and coral/shell hunting for some true islander souvenirs. I had to get some gelato during my bike ride, just because it reminded me too much of the book “EAT PRAY LOVE”. Half my Italian dream fell off my freshly baked cone before I took my first bite. Failed attempt. From now, I guess I will just stick to my own story and not someone else’s lol. My inner female Anthony Bourdain came out as I tried the bizarre fruits and vegetables of the island dishes. Bamboo seating’s with giant luscious trees hovering over you while you watch the white waves come to shore. Heaven on earth does exist.  

OH! I recently just celebrated another life long dream—HOLI! The festival of colors, representing the welcoming of spring, forgiveness, to choose the good over the bad, to resurrect old friendships, and to focus on the color in your life and not limit yourself to just black and white. My dream is to celebrate this in India, but it was just as perfect in Indonesia. It is a day where it does not matter what your status is. Or who your father is. If you are a woman, man, rich, poor, mean, or nice IT IS FAIR GAME. Powdered colors are thrown everywhere; buckets of colored water are poured down your head, and people running around with water guns/water balloons to drench their target. EVERYONE IS HAPPY! I ate Indian delicacies from the vendors, got some henna done, and danced in the pouring rain with kind loving strangers like I was the star of my own Bollywood film. I fell in love with life and my soul all over again. I couldn’t stop smiling, dancing, or loving. My feet were numb, my skin and clothes were stained of all colors, and my entire body was saturated without a single care. I have never felt so effortlessly careless. It is a place where people can come to celebrate love and happiness, regardless of your background and faith, you are here to forget about the troubles of the past and embrace the gifts of the present. As the raindrops mixed with the droplets of colored water splashed onto my face and body from all directions, I knew every damn thing was going to be okay. Lodi lodi! <3

Now I can go on forever explaining how perfect these parts of Indonesia are but I won’t because my hands are tired. Traveling can be hard but it will be rewarding. If you stick to your gut and do what is the good and right thing to do, it will work out for you. Your perspective has to stay in the light, but it needs to know what darkness is as well.

Hold on to the little things: when a student ACTUALLY understands you and you witness learning happening. When a person who is living in poverty smiles at you as if they have no problem in the world that changes your mood, day, and life. Or even coming home to words from far away friends and loved ones who just want you to be healthy, happy, and successful. PERSPECTIVE! Keep it, love it, and do not lose it. My traveling is temporary, but the lives I touch and the lives that touch me are forever. Be good to all; give kindness even when you feel like a bus hit you. You might have just made or even saved someone’s day. Keep the light with you, even when it is trying its best to dim on you. That light is humanity and love. It needs your passion and compassion to keep shining.

            In terms of my health and spirituality, I have been trying my best to challenge myself daily. Usually I do workouts in my room with the insanity video, that my roommates always make fun of for the grunts and painful sounds I make during my work out in closed doors. Some days I lack spiritual guidance, and then the other days I realize the beauty of my spirituality is not just in my journey in Indonesia, but back home with my loved ones. The love of my life Mateen, he challenges me to be a better/happier person to keep searching for the love of God. With his love and guidance, I really feel like I perform better throughout my journey. The best gift God could give me is a soul mate that helps me get closer to God.

Goals for myself: eat more foods from the earth, read more books, pray more, and find more volunteer work with non-profits. Goals are what keep us sane when we are lost and seeking love and guidance in new places. Cheers.

Thanks for caring/loving/reading

xo

melody

THE BASICS

Okay, so I am going to try this Blog out and see how it goes. Well for those who do not know, I am in Indonesia for the year teaching abroad yay! Okay here is some basic info, ready? DISCLOSURE: I will only state what I see and have been exposed to. No political or religious propaganda.

Let me get all wikipedia on your for a second. Indonesia is an archipelago with over 17,500 islands, dozens of cultural influences including Chinese, Arabic, Dutch, French, and Indian, and religions, however; Islam is dominant with over 80% of the population being Muslim-Sunni. I, however, live in the capital Jakarta on the Island of Java! If you want to know more about its EXTENSIVE and many times brutal history, geography, and other contents…google it.

When I first arrived and stepped off the plane my initial reaction was “HELL NO!” I cannot do this for a year; I need my return ticket ASAP. The smell oh god…just imagine heavy-duty smokers indoors and outdoors your lungs will love the hell out of you for that, trash because they burn their shit LITERALLY, sweat and dirty must and because the concept of personal space is long gone…my friends get ready to make new best friends with people who do nothing but stare at you while rubbing against your arm and side, and all the polluted toxic waste dumps that are always nearby that you will step on and flick on your pant legs throughout your walks. I mean, I’ve lived in Iran, I knew it would be similar to Indonesia in several ways, but smell is always a difficult thing to become acquainted with. Oh and my cold showers, first you must say goodbye to warm water and hello to cold water and hello to the rustic iron smell that exudes throughout the wet room. HELLOGOODBYE!

When I was finally given my moment with Indonesia, that moment I knew I could do this for a year I started introducing myself to things I did not like--differently. I mean, come on, you cannot change a culture or a lifestyle that’s been embedded in the minds of every generation for centuries you either learn from it or go home. I chose the latter…to make it my home.  

My 4 mile walks to and from work are the highlights of my day instead of dreaded like any westerner would see it when there are flashfloods, and rats the size of “Jack Russell Terriers” (as my roommate Megan puts it) running rapidly inches away from your feet. Instead you embrace the warm raindrops for either way they will break your umbrella because they do not want you to have any form of protection from their strength. You find yourself playing hopscotch near the congested traffic (that LA-SF SHOULD NEVER COMPLAIN ABOUT), to avoid the very muddy to the not so muddy puddles, sometimes you fail and fall shin deep, you laugh, well because you cannot do a dang thing about it. My favorite part, is walking nearly barefoot on the blackened street with green bamboo trees on the surrounding edges and dark clouds hovering over me with no sign of hard rain yet, just as the Azan plays (the call of prayer for Muslims). That moment, I truly feel infinite and say few words of thanks aloud. I talk to myself a lot during my walks. The Indonesians probably think I am nuts ahah. A friend of mine, a fellow teacher told me the moment she heard the Azan, her reaction was “it is a moment of belief, even if you are not a believer.”

The people of Indonesia are the kindest humans on the planet, all they want to do is share their smiles and basic English with you. “HELLO MISTER”, regardless if you are a man or woman you will hear this repeatedly on a daily basis. When I have a chance to snap a photo, they are more than willing to pose for me; they actually really love photos, which is surprising for me since it is an Islamic country and most women would want to protect their identity, however, keep in my mind there is no Shariah Law=Islamic Law in Indonesia.  I will talk about Islam in this country in another entry. You get used to the constant stares, hollers, and howls that you learn to mute it out. I realized that it comes in handy being a foreigner because EVERYONE and their moms (literally) know who you are. The security guards in my neighborhood, I am not sure how, know my name so every morning I get a “good morning melohhhdeeee” with their mobile phones aimed at my face for a photo. The time that I was lost, the random far away neighbor knew how to get me to my door. It comes in handy, especially for a “directionally-inept” person like me haha.

As far as teaching, I am in training right now so I have not received my own sets of students yet. But, they all seem so adorable! Some of them will be little “pet demons” as one of the teachers puts it hahah. I am looking forward to teaching someone the language that can bring him or her endless opportunities. It will be difficult since Bahasa Indonesian has absolutely no tenses, and each sounds remain the same, for example “A” is always “AHH”. So it will be difficult, but the challenge is accepted. Learning Indonesian on the other hand is not TOO bad, but I am still a long ways to go lol.

I am grateful that I have made a good group of friends here especially my roommates, and have met some extraordinary women from all over the world! I think Indonesia is the best place to bring people together, to share and take experiences. I mean their nightlife alone is like the Asian Dubai, very extravagant and top of the line that draws people from all over the place. Definitely did not expect that. On another note, everyone has their own story and they just need someone to listen even if you do not speak a word of their language, it’s the patience and kindness that counts. Well, I am here to listen!

Silly fact: I sleep with my lights on because I am scared the lizards will sleep on my face in the dark or a rat will appear as my pillow.

Long term Goals: A few of my goals here are to obviously teach English, travel (twice a month), meet and greet everyone, and to learn more about my personal spirituality and Islam.

If you have questions, I am here!

Thanks for reading!

Cheers!

xo

This is the river by my house! The locals fish here! Jakarta, Indonesia