I used to always think never
underestimate the power of a shower. I choose my words carefully now. I am just
grateful for running water to clean the mud off my body. SIDE NOTE: Do not
think all of Indonesia is like this lol, it is just where I live. There are
luxurious homes and villas a person would love to die in because it is so clean
and perfect. END NOTE. However, there are days I want to take a hot shower or
bubble bath to ease my nerves. Instead I get cold metallic water that smells of
every element on the periodic table. You would think I’d at least have the
shower to myself. Nope. I have to share it with the stray lizards and creepy
insects. Personal space does not exist in this country lol.
I find my moments of escapes to be
a clean Persian princess, outside my humanitarian ways in the quaint and humble
Javanese salons of Jakarta. I usually try to do this once a month, a WHOLE
BODY, MIND, AND SOUL cleanse. I am there for at least eight hours, scrubbing
the pollution, mud, dirt, and disgust that have been trapped under my skin and
cuticles for the last month. A full detoxifying ritual, body scrubs, massages,
a seaweed wrap, body masks (honey/yogurt, or mud, etc), full botanical deep moisturizing/invigorating
facial, royal manicure and pedicure (you should see the dead skin they scrape
off, it’s disgusting, I am disgusting), and a cream bath for my hair. All of
the products are natural and organic, which is even more blissful. The settings
differ from each spa, but since it is my treat to myself I usually try to
choose the best of the best, I want the authentic Javanese salon that makes me
feel like I am in an Eastern heaven. The best part is converting your USD (U.S
Dollars) to IDR (Indonesian Rupiahs). When I tell you I go full out, I mean it.
I feel like a whole new woman. I take advantage of the hot water supply, and
bathe in every inch of the stone made Jacuzzis filled with rose petals. If I
were to have ALL of the treatments (eight hours worth) done in the U.S. I would
be in debt. However, our currency is much stronger which brings it to our
benefit to enjoy the extravagant and luxurious lifestyle of SE Asia. A one-hour
hot stone massage with essential oils in the states would be about $100-150 (at
a luxury spa); here it is about $5-20 depending on where you go. So keep that
in perspective when I say, I TAKE ADVANTAGE of these moments of escapes. Then
after my treatment is over, I step outside and it is pollution 101 clogging my
extracted pores all over again. It was good while it lasted
Before I get started on my trips/adventures
let me touch base about my students. Teaching has been a rollercoaster on its
own. My younger students are a handful for the most part, but it feels good knowing
that they are learning and soaking up the knowledge quickly. I love them all so
much, and I am grateful to teach every one of them even when they are crazy
devils. I was the same at their age, it’s my karma I guess haha.
My lessons are far more meaningful
and touching with my older students. I feel like I actually make a useful
difference apart from teaching them English. I am helping some of them prepare
for foreign exams so they can get scholarships to study abroad for university.
I am helping someone with his or her future; it is kind of a big deal lol.
Then you have the self-confiding
moments that every insecure teenager around the world goes through.
Example: Miss can I ask you a
personal question? "How dark is my skin on a scale of 1-10, I'm not very
confident." -my 16 year old boy student.
Me: "Listen...all of you. This skin. What is the purpose of it? It's your
biggest organ; its sole purpose is to protect you. Right? In terms of color, we
are all different because if we were the same, how boring of a world would that
be? Many people in the western world tan to get your golden skin.
Including myself. So please, listen to me when I say your skin is alluring and
made perfectly just for you. Now I don't ever want to hear you question your
confidence on something that is so intriguingly beautiful about each and
everyone of you."
I felt a genuine shift in the class, in a very good way. They started
reflecting for how grateful they are for having skin in the first place, and
that God made them healthy.
They all smiled, and continued the lesson. I have never had them smile, laugh,
and love so much to the point they were on the floor cracking up from joy. A
great lesson it was, a difference it made too. I think this is when they say
teaching can be very rewarding, but very difficult. I was in tears after
because I was so overwhelmed. I love these kids. Otherwise I wouldn't care and
would just work merely for the purpose of travel. It's a difficult topic and I
don't know if I am the person or adequate for it. I'm born with fair skin and I
cannot further relate exactly with their insecurities only understand with my
own similar ones. Then I think does my word really make a difference to them?
Am I even privileged to say a word to them? It's a VERY difficult subject.
THIS isn't America. Standards and laws differ, and God is
mentioned all the time for it's their primary focus. So on a positive it's
great to mention god and that kind of allows them to put things in perspective
to be thankful rather than to self-hate what he created for them. I would
appreciate any help/input. I am in a position where my word can make or break a
person’s self-esteem, and I will not allow it to break.
PART II
I
have been quite the adventure seeker. One of my craziest and most brilliant
experiences was zip lining across a lake that changes colors (pink-orange,
blue-green) depending on the reflection of the sun. It was amongst the tea
plantations with humongous aged trees surrounding the lake’s scenery. It was
the perfect picture for a cabin magazine ad—minus the cold weather. You have
little bamboo made houseboats floating by for that real authentic feel. Oh, and
you cannot forget the dozens of ugly wild monkeys that will steal anything and
everything that is in your hand! They are mean and they’re running around
everywhere. I climbed up the ladder that led me to the giant tree to swing me
off to the zip line with no hesitation. You cannot wait, you have to jump right
into it, and keep your eyes open! It was magnificent; I was flying through the
fog with the beautiful breeze and tiny raindrops striking against my entire
body. My eyes have never been so open and eager to wander around! The vicious
monkeys, huge green trees up down left and right, tea plantations for acres,
the steady colorful lake below my stomach, the man selling fresh organic honey
in the corner far below, I could see it all and taste it all. I did not want
this moment to end. It only lasted a minute or two. It was worth it. I now know
what it means to feel infinite or I think I do. The few experiences I’ve
shared, including this one have made my entire trip.
Traveling and doing what I can to
help the world is all that I could ask for in my twenties. It comes with a
price: my happiness and sanity (I am making it sound more drastic than it
really is lol). Sometimes I lose it because I cannot accept my so-called “bad”
situations outside my comfort zone. Like when I am hospitalized with no
English-speaking doctors or because it is my fault for not speaking their language
fluently, and little to no translation is available. Or walking in the rain
with no cash for rides and going to pharmacy to pharmacy pointing at my doctors
note to find the antidote my body needs. I still never found it lol. It
would’ve been frustrating in the states too. I would’ve called Rite Aid and had
them check their system to see which is the closest pharmacy that carries the
drug, to save my time and money. That is the downside of living in a developing
country; the easy shortcuts are luxuries not necessities. Obviously, I manage
and I am able to make myself laugh from the outrageous situations. From having
a fever and an infection (my armpit was the size of a golf ball) I continue my
walk in the rain with my eyes open to see what I sometimes forget to thank God
for: the heavenly view after the rain. Trees look healthier the roads are
cleaner, and when I walk by this specific street on my block I stop for a
moment, I can get a tiny whiff of fresh rose water, it’s only for two seconds
though. Then it is back to pollution and wet dog stenches streaming down my
lungs. Those tiny little things are what keep me going and give me that spark
of happiness that I need to be grateful for the life I live. It is not much. When
you do not have the same luxuries you are used to, you make the most of what
you got and get. I like to talk to my God on my walks home, it makes me feel
like “hey no matter what happens in this crazy city, I know someone is sending
me small gifts to tell me they care and to motivate me to keep going for my
temporary time here”.
Not everyone who travels the world goes for the same reasons.
Many may perhaps be running away from their previous lives. Some might be just
like me who want international experience, to help others, and to travel their
world. Or they may just be drunken hippies backpacking the world in search of
what is written for them. Some of the people are great with interesting
stories. Some aren’t. It’s nice to listen to them either way. We all need
someone to listen. It makes us feel better.
It is hard to find people who can totally relate to your
situation. Even people from back home will not be able to understand you
because they have never done it before (unless you are lucky and have friends
who traveled/lived in the developing world then you are awesome lol). You do
not want to sound like an ethnocentric asshole, first world princess/prince, or
an inept traveler. I do not want to fit a typical Westerner/American stereotype
that can’t handle some of the worldly situations thrown at her. BUT, DAMN! It
is hard. I will admit that I struggle. I will keep struggling. And much respect to those who can
handle some things that I cannot, but then what world would we live in if everyone
can do everything? Just know whatever you are going through, if you keep
fighting for it because you believe in it, eventually it will work out. And if
it doesn’t, well there are a plethora of pathways you have not discovered yet.
Keep moving. Every experience is a lesson; it depends on your character on what
you make of it. Always choose the light, it will guide you to better directions
and will keep you happy. I’m learning to follow this direction myself. Even if
I have to make a few detours, I will eventually find it. So will you. It’s
written.
PART III
Thankfully
I have been sticking to my goals. I have been traveling around Indonesia,
learning more about my spirituality, and rediscovering my likes and dislikes in
this small world.
Belitung Island in Sumatra, the
most beautiful island my eyes have ever witnessed. My eyes were burning because
of how heavenly it was. My trip was unplanned, the stupidest thing a person can
do. But, I am melody; I do a lot of stupid things haha. In my mind, I always
think it will work out, but I still need to prepare better for ohhh you know,
solo trips around a foreign country where I know no one and do not speak their
language. I am sure it would be a smart thing to do, right?
When I arrive I am ripped off of
nearly all the cash I have on me! The perks of being a foreigner! The hotel
room I originally booked had a mandi (you shower with a bucket), so I upgraded
to the only room with a hot shower. In a struggle to communicate using body
language like a two year old with the receptionists of how to get around the
island for my few days there, I nearly broke down into tears because I was so
helpless. The people are so kind in trying their best to understand me, and I
know it is my fault for not picking up the language well enough; it was still a
messy moment. I laughed instead. I laughed to the point we all started
laughing, because I knew in my heart it would be resolved. God always helps
good people. My gift appeared right then, a family of three who happened to
speak English, and had one space left in their trip. I looked up at them, and
couldn’t thank them enough from the bottom of my heart. I thanked the man
above, simultaneously.
This family became my family for
the weekend and a part of my life; they opened my heart even more. We traveled
the exotic beauties together. Rock climbed the ocean rocks, snorkeled, island
hopped, enjoyed fresh coconuts by the sea, ate oysters off the coral
(illegally, but I had to be Anthony Bourdain lol), and enjoyed the God given
sunsets. We learned about the islanders’ organic medicines with every bite of
the seafood/medicine we devoured. Every island had its individual beauty
whether it was the massive starfishes and sea creatures or the fresh seafood
for less than $5 a plate. Trash becomes non-existent the further the islands,
the only trash are coconut shells and oyster shells. One of the islands had a turtle
conservatory for Hawksbill turtles. They would catch the turtles, breed them,
and take care of their eggs because the Komodo dragons eat the turtles! They
are preventing them from becoming an endangered species, by creating a habitat
that is safe for the turtles. Once the eggs are hatched they send them back to
the sea. The islanders are good people. The non-profits are authentic and
relevant to the islanders’ way of life that will sustain their future
generations too. Walking to the conservatory was the best part, an exotic
pathway resembling the movie/book “A Jungle Book”. Haha I felt like Moglie!!
Belitung is known for their tin
mines, which are absolutely gorgeous, the clouds reflection is shown in the
water! They are the second largest tin exporter in the world. Our guide (it was
his first time as a guide) took us to the most magnificent secret spots of the
islands. I really appreciate this island for keeping the culture alive,
absolutely little to no westernization. For example there are no gas stations,
just small mom and pop shops with bottles filled with gasoline and a funnel
tube. Old school.
I was soaking the lush palm trees,
the oceanfront small traditional wooden houses, and the non-congested roads.
You would see the elderly people walking nearly barefoot to the mosque to
adhere to their prayer times. People were simply alive. After a long day of
island hopping, my family asked the guide to stop by the mosque to pray. I
watched them cleanse their soul and thank God, for the blessing in their life.
I couldn’t believe it. Especially on vacation, a time to be selfish and worldly,
they still stopped to pray for a thank you to their creator. I don’t know why
it touched me so much, something so normal for them and yet foreign to me. They
are magnificent people with warm souls; God really has protected and loved
them. You can see it. We all agreed it was in God’s plan to meet. Want to know
the craziest part; they live very close to me in Jakarta…like 10-15 minutes
away!
I can’t explain everything as much
as I would like to. I have been given gifts and stories from people that I was
meant to meet and love. My last day on the island after my new family had left
to go back home, I spent it with my guide on the back of his motorbike soaking
in the island’s magic. I was soaking it all up. Riding on the back of a
stranger’s bike, who later then became my friend. We didn’t speak each other’s
languages, so we used what little we knew and Google translate if the signal
permitted it. You don’t need language to communicate, it can happen with effort
and kindness. He took me to his home first “miss, me family, you come” I said
okay to it all. I knew I was safe.
They didn’t have much. It was an
open room with no furniture. I sat on the floor and they kindly offered me what
they had. They were humble people who wanted to gaze at their foreign guest.
The little girls would play with my tangled hair and smile. I couldn’t stop but
admire all of their beauty, inner and outer! I am grateful for this moment
because I was able to rely a message to these young girls who kept admiring my
skin color and nose as being the look to “aspire” for. Which is complete
bullshit. Only because I am fair-skinned with a big Persian nose in comparison
to their golden skin and flatter nose. The self-love was missing. I had to show
them how beautiful they are and how people even try to aspire for their look. I
don’t know how I was able to do it with my few words of Bahassa, but she was
happy. That’s all that matters. Insecurities are universal no matter if you are
rich or poor. We have to remind people of what they have physically and
internally. That may save a young lady from starving herself or from whitening
her skin to resemble a falsified “perfection” from a screwed up societal
standard. Developing or developed country, we all need to know how beautiful
and loved we are. It’s human matters.
My guide and I continue our
adventure to the top of the mountain in the rain to the waterfall. He brings us
snacks and we have our little picnic in scrambled words and laughter. There is
no feeling better than riding on a motorbike in a scenic route in the rain.
Your hair will hate you especially if it is long, but you will feel so alive
and awakened.
We set off to the mountains near
this park for zip lining, trampoline/bungee jumping (which I did, painfully
lol), and a gorgeous sunset in the land that continues for acres. The family
that owned this park was so kind and hospitable to me. They were showing me
around everywhere and taking photos of my every move lol. I am so grateful for
all the kind-hearted people I have met thus far. They really have showed me
more love than I could have ever expected. But, its like the saying goes “what
you give to the world, you receive”.
Now I can go on and on, about how
fantastic my trips and experiences have been. But I will stop here. This is my
story; I am reading the pages that were already written for me. Some pages I
will be stuck on, some I will skip, and others will be erased. It’s my story; we
all have one. Let’s live it.